my mission in coaching
My mission is to hold space for beings, who are trying to meet other’s needs before their own and find themselves in a painful disconnection from themselves and their senses. My own experience of harmonizing constant conflict with my needs and with addiction cycles, as well as deep connections in my life, are my guidance in this process.
I am wholeheartedly given to, when I get to lovingly hold one’s hand (virtually) while they explore their inner world, also the complex emotions, that surface in discovering presence. And I burst with celebration when they naturally take small steps into the direction of the vision they have uncovered within.
I deeply believe that cultivating safety in presence and in connection, brings to light, what we need and desire and in that, makes space for choosing to nurture what’s around us. From a grounded, loving place.
With my intuitive creative expression, Self-reflection tools and breathwork practices, I show my clients how they can let go of limiting beliefs and allow the release of unresolved trauma.
My ultimate goal is for my clients to build a sustainable friendship with themselves and step by step a fulfilling and meaningful life.
my story
Up until four years ago my life was fully designed around distraction from pain. From puberty on, I drank daily, on the weekends heavily when out clubbing. My Sunday to Thursday were a blur of nutrient dense foods, screens, inner conflict and hard work as a chef.
I couldn’t feel safe unless I was in a romantic partnership. I was terrified of losing my partner. Sharing my feelings and needs, felt like hurting them, felt like the risk of losing them. I was truly practiced at pleasing the ones around me, at the expense of hiding parts of me in the depth of my being. When I physically crouched from the internal pain of disconnection, when my insides screamed for love, so loud, I couldn’t overhear, I ran. Into the next partnership.
And then, after thirteen years of those patterns, someone ran away from me. And I broke down in pain. Lying on the ground, I knew, this has got to stop. Right there I decided, to create myself a new life.
Since then, I studied process design, focussing on healing and art. Step by step I have become more aware of how I think, speak, and feel. I read books, I talked and listened to friends. I created myself a practice of compassionate and celebratory self-talk. I reconnected to my sober creativity and playfulness. This process was a bumpy ride, to say the least. And also, I never lost sight, of wanting to feel whole again more sustainably and of wanting to cultivate happiness from within.
And I then, I found out, how my striving for independence can make me feel lonely, detached and that parts of me believe, that asking for help and sharing how I truly feel, is terrifying.
I started embracing the idea, that I can trust with my whole body. That, yes, I can hold myself. And that others feel held when I allow them to hold me. That wholeness happens in connection with me and with what’s around me.
Today I know, that I will have more and less awareness of myself and of this truth, of this trust. And I know from experience I can cultivate it, and I can support others in cultivating it.
To remind you and me and because it’s the most fulfilling work I know of, is why I chose to make this a substantial part of my life.